I Think I Just Threw Up In My Mouth

Really? Gene Chizik? When Jay Jacobs paid a $5 million buyout to the current coach (who was not fired, but who resigned) and then said that in hiring a new coach, "Money is not a concern," this was the guy they hired?

Gene Chizik, the guy who bolted Auburn after the 2004 season to be the co-defensive coordinator at Texas because it was more likely to land him head coaching opportunities? Seriously, this guy bolted after a 13-0 season and basically told Auburn it was a bad place for his career. And we're the big time school that ultimately gives him a prestigious head coaching job!?! How stupid does Auburn look for making that move.

Gene Chizik, who went 5-19 in two seasons at Iowa State, including 2-10 in 2008. Did Auburn just do Chizik the biggest favor imaginable by hiring him before he was fired by the Cyclones? Iowa State, a bottom-feeder in the Big XII, but still a program that has had moderate success in recent years. They've been to 5 bowl games this decade. However, Chizik showed no ability to turn that program around. At all. Compare his body of work to Turner Gill's three seasons at Buffalo. Gill went 8-5 and won the MAC Championship. Chizik couldn't even reach bowl eligibility. Chizik lost the final 10 games of the season, and 1 of his 2 wins this year was against FCS South Dakota State.

Oh, but Gene Chizik is a defensive wizard who masterminded Auburn's defense in 2004 and Texas' defense in 2005, you say? How were his defenses at Iowa State? The Cyclones allowed 42 points per game in 2008. Here are the point totals allowed for the final 9 games of the year: 34, 35, 38, 3, 49, 59, 28, 52, and 38. And Iowa State didn't even play Texas Tech, Oklahoma or Texas, the 3 best offensives in the conference. The Cyclones finished 111th in total defense (452 yds/game) even with the most favorable schedule in the Big XII (a. they play in the North division; and b. they avoided the top 3 teams in the South division). Yikes.

Chizik arguably left Iowa State in worse shape than he found it. In 2006, the final season before Chizik's arrival, the Cyclones allowed merely 30 points and 392 yards per game to their opponents. The team went 4-8 that year, and fired Dan McCarney. Chizik promptly went 3-9 out of the gates in 2007, and then followed it up with a 2-10 mark this season. I wouldn't be surprised if Cyclones fans are dancing in the streets that he's gone. Maybe they'll do the smart thing and hire Turner Gill.

It's tough to be a Longhorn this morning . . .

I can't take credit for coming up with this, but it's pretty funny, and so is this Southpark version of Big XII coaches. Yes, it's from 2006, but the Mangino is priceless.

BCS DECLARES GERMANY WINNER OF WORLD WAR II - US Ranked 4th

After determining the Big-12 championship game participants the BCS
computers were put to work on other major contests and today the BCS
declared Germany to be the winner of World War II.
"Germany put together an incredible number of victories beginning with
the annexation of Austria and the Sudetenland and continuing on into
conference play with defeats of Poland, France, Norway, Sweden, Denmark,
Belgium and the Netherlands. Their only losses came against the US and
Russia; however considering their entire body of work--including an
incredibly tough Strength of Schedule--our computers deemed them worthy
of the #1 ranking."

Questioned about the #4 ranking of the United States the BCS
commissioner stated "The US only had two major victories--Japan and
Germany. The computer models, unlike humans, aren't influenced by
head-to-head contests--they consider each contest to be only a single,
equally-weighted event."

German Chancellor Adolph Hitler said "Yes, we lost to the US; but we
defeated #2 ranked France in only 6 weeks." Herr Hitler has been
criticized for seeking dramatic victories to earn 'style points' to
enhance Germany's rankings. Hitler protested "Our contest with Poland
was in doubt until the final day and the conditions in Norway were
incredibly challenging and demanded the application of additional
forces."

The French ranking has also come under scrutiny. The BCS commented "
France had a single loss against Germany and following a preseason #1
ranking they only fell to #2."

Japan was ranked #3 with victories including Manchuria, Borneo and the
Philippines.

The Skinny on Mike Leach

Rumors abound that Auburn wants Mike Leach to be the next head football coach. Here's my take on Leach.

Good:

1. Nine straight winning seasons at Texas Tech, with nine bowl appearances (5 wins)

2. Only once has he had a losing record in Big XII conference play (3-5 in 2000)

3. No probation or NCAA penalties

Bad:

1. His career record against Oklahoma is 2-7. Both wins were at home.

2. His career record against Texas is 3-6. All 3 wins were at home.

3. This is the same guy that lost to Mike Shula's Alabama team in the Cotton Bowl following the 2005 season

4. He's obsessed with Pirates.

Leach is the wrong guy for Auburn. Period. If Leach has ever sat in on a defensive meeting, I'd be shocked. This guy is an offensive guru, but that's not what Auburn needs. Auburn needs a football coach that understands the SEC, can recruit solid players, and who can actually beat his biggest rivals.

Blame This Guy

I'm stunned. Shocked. Terrified. If 85 wins and 7 Iron Bowl victories in 10 years is not enough to satisfy the boobs that now run Auburn University, then what will it take?

Why would Auburn run off a coach that has been incredibly successful, runs a clean program, loves the University, and epitomizes "Auburn football" for the flavor of the week? With that I'm referring to rumors that Auburn has unofficially gauged Texas Tech coach Mike Leach's interest in the job. Really? Mike Leach. That gimmick offense will never work. The man could care less about defense. Auburn football is about defense, power running, and toughness. Those are three things you won't find at Texas Tech.

Want to blame someone? Blame Bobby Lowder. I don't get this guy. Did he force out a coach who has won 6 of the last 7 games against Alabama simply because he wouldn't worship at the feet of all things Lowder? How can he claim to love Auburn, and act in Auburn's best interest, when he does something this stupid? Karma has a funny way of working. I guarantee you that Mississippi State is going to be all over Tuberville. And when State beats Auburn next year in Jordan-Hare, I might be cheering silently for the Bulldogs.

We Need Some Names

Everyone seems preoccupied with whether or not Coach Tuberville is going to keep his job. Personally, I think he is a lock to stay. You don't fire a guy that's 7-3 against the school's biggest rival after one bad season. After two consecutive bad seasons? Maybe, but let's not throw away 2009 just yet. The search for the next offensive coordinator has been weighing on my mind, lately. What direction will Tuberville take the offense. Keep leaning towards the spread? A return to a traditional, more conservative, power offense? The "humanist" hybrid I talked about yesterday? It's hard to say. Since the humanist thing is my creation, I'm going to run with it. Here are some names I think will end up on the list that Tuberville chooses from. Oh, one name you won't be seeing is Chip Kelly.

Kelly is Oregon's offensive coordinator. He was recently named the "coach in waiting" when Mike Bellotti moves on to become the school's athletic director. Kelly, 45, was rumored to be of interest to Syracuse for their head coaching position. It's certain that Tuberville would have looked into hiring him. Using his spread-option offense, the Ducks are ranked fourth in the nation in rushing, averaging 277.8 yards a game, and are eighth in total offense with 467.2 yards a game. Kelly was also instrumental in developing former Oregon QB Dennis Dixon. If Tuberville was looking to keep the spread offense, Kelly was definitely the best available coordinator. On to the list, which is in no particular order.

1. Trooper Taylor, Co-Offensive Coordinator, Oklahoma State. Taylor is in his first year at Oklahoma State and serves as co-offensive coordinator and receivers coach. Taylor came from Tennessee, where he was on staff from 2004-07 and was assistant head coach/player development and receivers coach for the Volunteers. He is nationally-known for his prowess on the recruiting trail, and was recognized by Rivals.com as a top-25 recruiter in 2005 and 2007. His ability to recruit, his familiarity with the SEC, and his energetic rapport with the players (he's like the Will Muschamp of offensive assistants) would make him very desirable. I think he would become the first African-American offensive coordinator in SEC history, too. A public relations coup that might pay off on the recruiting trail. Taylor brought some major talent to Knoxville. Oklahoma State's offense has been outstanding this year. The Cowboys are 7th overall in total offense (489 yards/game), 8th in rushing (256 yards/game), 42nd in passing (233 yards/game), and 8th in scoring (41.5 points/game). So, who's the other co-coordinator in Stillwater, you ask?

2. Gunter Brewer, Co-Offensive Coordinator, Oklahoma State. Brewer is in his fourth season at Oklahoma State and his first as Co-Offensive Coordinator and quarterbacks coach. He served the three previous three seasons as wide receivers coach and passing game coordinator. He was one of the key minds behind one of the nation’s most dynamic and explosive offenses as I described above. Brewer coached receiver Adarius Bowman to back-to-back 1,000-yard receiving seasons in 2006 and 2007, as Bowman’s receptions totaled 1,181 yards in 2006 and 1,006 yards in 2007. Brewer also coached Dez Bryant to 622 receiving yards and a spot on Rivals.com’s 2007 Freshman All-America second team in 2007. If Auburn is looking to get better at the wide receiver position, then Brewer is a coach with a proven track record for recruiting and developing top-flight receivers. Before coming to Oklahoma State, Brewer developed outstanding receivers at Marshall (1996-99) and North Carolina (2000-04).

3. Stan Parrish, Offensive Coordinator, Ball State. Parrish has helped the Cardinals build a 12-0 record this season, designing an offense that leads the Mid-American Conference in scoring and total offense. Running back Quale Lewis leads the conference in rushing (130.8 yards/game), and quarterback Nate Davis is second in passing yards (257.9 yards/game). Parrish is one of five coaches in the running for the Broyles Award, given to the top assistant coach in the nation each year.

I'm sure there will be other names out there, and as I come across candidates I will try to profile them. I thought this would be a good starting point to discuss what's next for Auburn's offense. If you have a name to throw out there, then let me know.

Fixing Auburn's Offense

"This time, we're going to get somebody that understands this program. You have to understand your situation and what type of offense you can run with the type of players that you can get." Tommy Tuberville

This is a recent quote from Coach Tuberville when asked about the impending search for the next offensive coordinator. After a 5-7 season, and 36-0 loss to Alabama, it's certainly time for Auburn to return to the drawing board on offense. Tuberville has stated that he will take the entire month to conduct the search, and that the hire will probably not come until early in the new year. Tuberville also said that whoever he hires will be allowed to talk to the current assistant coaches on offense to decide if they are a good fit to remain on the Plains in 2009 and beyond.

Tuberville's openness regarding the offensive assistant coaches is not something I remember from the search that brought Tony Franklin to Auburn in December 2008. It always puzzled me that Auburn moved to a spread system, with a spread-option coordinator, but retained assistants that probably knew little or nothing about the spread offense. Most of those assistants, such as Eddie Gran (running backs), Hugh Nall (offensive line), and Steve Ensminger (wide receivers/tight ends) have been with Tuberville for awhile. Maybe Tuberville assumed that "football is football," and that the assistants could easily make the transition to the spread. Or Tuberville wanted to keep the assistants who had built relationships with high school coaches on the recruiting trail. Whatever the reason, they stayed, and the results were awful. There is good reason to believe that they struggled mightily at implementing "The Tony Franklin System." I know most of the blame is placed on Franklin, but I think some thought should be given to the role the assistants played, especially given the 1-5 record AFTER Franklin was fired midseason. Also, one should not ignore the fact that Auburn has a serious talent-drain on offense right now. It's very likely that Auburn would have finished no better than 8-4 under Al Borges (I think Auburn would have beaten Vanderbilt, LSU and Arkansas, which were all close losses against weak teams, even with the dreadful spread offense). 8-4 and a second straight trip to the Chik-fil-A Bowl sounds awfully good right about now, doesn't it?

But back to the quote that I started with. Does that sound like a man who wants to run the spread-option offense in 2009? Does it sound like a man that wants anything to do with a "system" offense? I think not. It sounds to me that Tuberville is looking for an offensive coordinator skilled at building an offense around the talents of his players rather than trying to find players that fit a rigid offensive system. Will that offense have a "personality?" Sure it will, and I bet it will look a lot more like the power-running, ball control offense of years past. I think the key here is flexibility. Tuberville wants to be more flexible from week to week, and from season to season. When injuries occur, when the talent level at a particular position doesn't develop as expected, or when playing a particular opponent, the offense must be able to adapt and come up with a gameplan that attacks an opponent's weaknesses and scores points consistently. I call this the "Humanist" philosophy of offense. Humanism is a broad category of ethical philosophies that affirm the dignity and worth of all people, based on the ability to determine right and wrong by appealing to universal human qualities, particularly rationality. Offensive humanists reject the dogmatic approaches of pure spread-option coaches (like Rich Rodriguez) or pure-anything coaches (e.g., Mike Leach's Texas Tech passing circus, or Paul Johnson's triple-option at Georgia Tech). Humanists look at the strength of his team, plus the weaknesses of his opponent, and develop a gameplan accordingly. Don't all offensive coordinators do this? Well, sort of. But you didn't see Rodriguez mix-in some pro-style offense for Michigan this year, did you? Rodriguez runs his system, regardless. And until they get the right players, they're going to struggle. The same goes for Paul Johnson. The reason Michigan went 3-9, and Georgia Tech 8-4, was not because one system is preferable to another, it was the talent on hand. Tech simply had more players that could run a triple-option offense than Michigan had to run the spread-option.

The ability to adapt requires a very skilled coach. Young players, scholarship limits, and caps on weekly practice time, all work against the offensive coordinator. That's why "system" offenses are so popular. The theory is that it's the best way to maximize the results given all of these limitations. Personally, I disagree with this philosophy. A good coach can make the humanist offense work. I think a system coach like Rodriguez actually sells out his players when he runs plays that won't work given the current talent. Sure, they are good plays, but only when Pat White and Steve Slaton are the ones running them. When Stephen Threatt and Sam McGuffie run them, not so much.

So, who are the best examples of humanist coaches? Here are a couple you might have heard of:

1. Norm Chow (UCLA). Chow is first and foremost an excellent quarterbacks coach. But he's also an excellent play-caller that builds his gameplan to take advantage of each opponent's unique flaws. He's constructed pass-happy offenses (think Ty Detmer and BYU), offenses that used running backs as pass receivers (think Philip Rivers and T.A. McClendon at N.C. State), and offenses with dynamic power runners (think Lendale White and Reggie Bush at USC).

2. Jim Tressel (Ohio State). Yeah, Tressel is the head coach, but he has always had a hand in the offense. Tressel was a run-first/run-all-the-time coach at Youngstown State and his early years at Ohio State (think Craig Krenzel and Maurice Clarrett). But he moved to a pass-first offense in the middle of this decade (think Troy Smith, Anthony Gonzalez and Ted Ginn, Jr.). Now he's back to a run-first offense, but it's with a spread-option twist (think Terrell Pryor and Beanie Wells). That's a clinic in how to: a) recruit, and b) build an offense that suits your talent.

The search will begin soon. Can Tuberville find an offensive coordinator that can recruit, teach, and gameplan? As long as he stays away from the "gurus" and rigid offensive philosophies, and focuses on a smart football coach who knows how to adapt to talent and opposing teams, Auburn will be back in contention very soon.